Memoir - The Day I Lost My Fingers, But Saw God's Hand.

Snowing January 2014

"The Lord is my shepherd, I’ll walk with Him Alway”.” Mom and I sang the familiar song. She had moved a little so that I could hold her foot. I wanted to know she was still there by me. I knew she was hurt badly. I had seen her face soon after she managed to find the ignition and turn the van off. She was covered in blood and her arm was lying at the wrong angle. My hand was trapped under the van, and I was lying in a fetal position on my knees. I was very scared. A man crawled in through one of the broken windows and crouched next to me.

“Hi, my name is Tom. Everything’s going to be ok. The ambulance is on its way.” Then he started asking questions, but my mind kept wandering. I saw my glasses on the floor next to me.

“Oh, look there are my glasses. I should probably get those before they get broken.” I thought, though for some reason I never picked them up.  I could see the ground outside it was covered in glass. “Cool, I never knew that the window glass is green!” these were all the weird thoughts going through my head. I was very scared! The next things I know I heard the sirens and saw that Tom was gone. Mom was worried about the other kids.

“Are my children OK? How many do you see? “She asked. The man counted and told my mom, but I didn’t hear the answer. They moved my mom away. She was lying on the ground half way in the van and half out of the van, which was blocking one of the ways to get to my hand. I heard my dad! He poked his head in the broken window.

“Are you ok Peanut? They’re going to get you out.” he said. I had been trying to move my hand and it was suddenly turning!

“It’s moving!” I yelled. Then my hand was free and I crawled out towards my dad. He carried me over to a paramedic who poured something on my hand. I didn’t even feel any pain until then. The hand looked horrible. There were hundreds of pieces of glass sticking out of it and I was missing my pinky finger. They rushed me to the stretcher and put me into the ambulance. I wanted to sleep, but this lady kept telling me to open my eyes. I told her I just couldn’t right now. I knew Joshua was in the ambulance with me so I kept trying to talk to him, but he was actually sitting in the front passenger seat. They put an IV in me and gave me Morphine for the pain and gave me oxygen. I also had neck brace on. Then I was at the hospital being wheeled into trauma room 2. It was bright and sunny in that room. It seemed like too big of a room for just one person. I was asked a bunch of medical and personal questions, including where I lived. I told them the church address for some reason and I couldn’t remember what shots I had already.

Every once in a while Josh would pop his head into my room, but he would go away before I could ask him anything. Later I learned that Melody and my mom were close by in the next rooms. I kept feeling a weird cold sensation on my ears so I asked the nurse next to me.

“I think there’s something in my ears”. I said. He checked for me then got a tissue and wiped my face for me.

“Your ears are fine. It’s just tears.”  He answered. I guess I was crying and didn’t even know it. I was there for some time before they told me that I was going to be taken in a helicopter to Nationwide Children’s Hospital, so that I could have surgery on my hand. They wheeled my bed over to mama, who was also in a neck brace, so that I could tell her goodbye.

“Can you come with me please”, I was crying. I didn’t want to go by myself. I was practically begging her. “I don’t want to go”.

“No, you need to stop crying right now! I can’t come with you because there isn’t room. Daddy is with the other kids. Papa will be at the hospital when you get there. I promise.” Then she told me that she loved me. The paramedics wheeled me to the helicopter. It was a very loud trip! When I tried to speak a couple times the nurse on board had to give me his microphone so he could me. As soon as I arrived into the hospital I saw papa. He had come! Papa came and sat next to me while we waited for the Doctor.

“Papa, do you think  that God has something special in my life?” I asked.

“I think that he has something special for everyone.” He answered. The doctor came up and talked to him for a few minutes. “Autumn, they are going to try to get some of the big pieces of glass out of your hand ok?”

“Will it hurt?” I asked.

“Yes, it will probably hurt a lot, but I’m going to be right here beside you.” After that they prepared me for surgery. By then my dad was on his way to the hospital and my mom was in Grant Hospital close by. Maggie, a family friend, came to sit with me too, so the surgeon used her phone to get dad’s permission for the surgery. Then they wheeled me away.

Although this was a very scary thing that happened in our family, there were so many things that we can be thankful for. I know that God was and is in control of our lives every day. Romans 8: says, “For we know that all things work together to good to them that are the called according to his purpose.”

by Autumn De Leon

Recently Autumn wrote this paper for her 11th grade Grammar class. The van accident on October 10, 2008, 5 years ago, was one of those memorable days for our family.  It is one of those times where you KNOW that God was with each one of us...He was there as He still is today.

Cassandra De Leon